When Hailey turned 18 this month I experienced a moment of panic. I remember that she had some plans for the day/weekend that didn't mesh with what I had planned. I don't think it was a huge deal, but I remember formulating the words in my mind. "No, you can't do that because I said so".... and then realizing that since she was 18 and technically an adult she could theoretically say... "go jump off a cliff mom.. I'm going to do what I want" and legally I wouldn't really have a leg to stand on. It was hard to lose that edge(:
Now, I realize that when someone lives in my house and eats my food and drives my car and I can make most of the rules about what is ok and what is not... no matter their age... but still.. it illustrated the point pretty clearly for me.. that many of my children are now able to decide big important things, without my input.
That is a GOOD thing.
But also pretty scary.
I do, in my head, have some clear goals for all of them and ideas about where I think they should be and what they should be doing.
The trick to all of this is knowing that it is their life. I can give them wise council and be a sounding board. But sometimes the lessons are theirs to learn. They take the long way instead of the nice, clear easy path. They pick a job, a major, a destination that I would be uncomfortable with, but that they are great with!
And I must smile and remember that I never really wanted to do exactly what my parents wanted me to do.
I wanted to do things my way!
Even though now I know that my parents were the wisest and best. And even when I pretend that I don't, I do listen carefully to every piece of advise that they give/have given me.
Growing pains.. Growing up.
Not for the faint of heart.
No comments:
Post a Comment